Have Tea With Me

Coffee, tea, whatever. 

Having coffee or tea with someone I love to talk to is one of my favorite things. I love the idea that you can just sit there for hours talking about anything and everything, or maybe nothing at all and just sit in comfortable silence. I love it.

I also love the idea of breakfast. I’m never up early enough to actually have breakfast, (unless it’s a pre-scheduled date and I’m actually willing to wake up that early for you) but on regular days it’s always brunch, which is also great, but I really like breakfast. Having breakfast with someone is basically starting your day with them, and I think that’s lovely.

I’d like to think that I'll end up a with a foodie someday. I love people who love food and love discovering new hidden restaurants with yummy food and things like that. Someone I can go on a quest for the best red velvet and cheesecake in the Metro with, or someone who can go wine tasting with me even though we don’t really know jack about wine. I love wine, I just can’t tell distinct differences. I’d love to know how.

Or maybe someone who likes to go to museums, and not ironically to make fun of people who do. Someone who genuinely likes to go to museums. Or at least someone who would be up for it. Not like I have any artistic credibility or anything, I just like looking at beautiful things and appreciating the work that the artist has put into it. Or just for educational purposes because learning new things is cool. I was one of those kids who loved going to museums during field trips while everyone else was bored.

Come with me, let’s go do boring things together.

21 Reasons Why We Don't Work

1. I quite like getting lost in books and you don't understand why. 
2. I like theater, and you can't be bothered with anything musical.
3. It's like you purposely don't like to look good. I mean, really. Put a little bit of effort.
4. You don't understand Twitter. (yeaaah, sometimes I don't too)
5. You think Hanson and boy bands are stupid. WELL... no. Piss off.
6. You are too headstrong sometimes, and so am I. 
7. I'm not a big fan of ketchup, so we can never share a burger because you will murder it. Why don't you like mustard? Mustard is good. Mustard is safe. Mustard > Ketchup.
8. You like to play with people's feelings, which I think isn't very nice. 
9. The things I can't do, you can, but you just won't and it pisses me off so much. 
10. You're stuck in the past, and sometimes I am too. Let's just move on already.
11. I would just rather stay at home and hang out with a few friends.
12. I like discovering beautiful things and when I do, you're just... "MEH."
13. We have different tastes in music and we can't just agree to disagree.
14. You're not much of a "feelings" person, which is fine, I've accepted it. But it's still nice to hear it sometimes.
15. I'm too emotional sometimes.
16. I don't tell you what's wrong.
17. You're jaded.
18. I'm clingy.
19. We don't talk.
20. I would like to go places and you don't. You want to stay wherever it's comfortable and I can't do that. I mean, I can, but if given a choice, I don't think I will. I'd rather be challenged to get the best out of me and then settle down comfortably after I learn things about myself and the world. 
21. You settle and I always want more.

At the end of the day, I will always be the dreamer and you will always be the realist. You are all the things that I am not, and that is why we work.

TV Shows and Feelings

Last night me and some girl friends, like the old ladies we are, spent the night playing Scrabble and Monopoly Deal, drinking tea and talked about feelings and stuff until 4 in the morning. Yup. On a Wednesday. See how badass we are? Of all the things we talked about last night, this is probably my favorite funny moment.

Now, if you know me or if you follow me on Tumblr or Twitter, you would absolutely know that I am a fangirl. I mean, I don't write fanfictions and stuff, but I'm pretty emotionally invested. I'm a lot invested, actually. I don't know. Just... feelings. Harry Potter and my tv shows get most of it. Occasionally Taylor Swift, but that's besides the point. You guys obviously know this because your timeline would be filled with my feelings when I watch my tv shows. I'm sure you hate me when I do that, but sorry, I'm not sorry.

Anyway, on to my story. My friend Lauren just finished watching the first season of Friday Night Lights so we started talking about it, and by talking I mean going back and forth with our favorite scenes and lines with little squeals in between. And the annoying sap that I am, I get emotional when I talk about my tv shows. Always. Especially when it's One Tree Hill, Dawson's Creek, The OC, and the most recent addition, Friday Night Lights. I have more tv shows, but these are my heart crushing, emotion-filled, turn-my-world-upside down shows. So yeah, we were talking about it and then I started talking about my tv shows as if they were my past relationships. IT WAS SO RIDICULOUS, YOU GUYS! I'M LAUGHING AS I'M TYPING THIS IN ALL CAPS!

I was all, "Yeah, 'cause One Tree Hill will always be my first great love."--still laughing while I'm typing this, fyi-- but it's true! That show saved my life multiple times. Just... ugh. That show will always have a special place in my heart. I am that show's bitch. I literally cried in a fetal position when I watched the series finale. Moving on, it went to "I have all these feelings for Friday Night Lights because it's one of those things that I never expected at all, but it's there. Wala na 'kong nagawa. Ganon eh. I fell in love. (I couldn't do anything about it)"  OH MY GOD I AM STILL LAUGHING  And then finally I say, "I think I'm scared of Grey's Anatomy and how it's going to make me feel. I feel like if I plunge in and watch it, I will be destroyed forever. I can't. I just.. can't." -- IT'S SO PATHETIC, I CANNOT COMPREHEND MYSELF HAHAHAHA!

I DON'T EVEN. I don't know, but yes, that conversation did actually happen. Not in those exact words, but that's the gist, basically. And I don't know why I'm posting this here for all of you to laugh at, but I just felt that it was so funny and ridiculous and pathetic that I needed to share it.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

Blogging and Facebook Couples

So, this new blog has been pretty good for me so far. I guess I should've figured out earlier that blogging this way (with actually paragraphs and updates) on Tumblr would never work. That's where I put my crazy fangirl self, and this is where I'm going to blog. Like, forealz. I'll probably try and post my old blog entries from Tumblr some other time, but that can wait. I guess I rule out Tumblr as a blog because for me it's more of a scrapbook, I guess? But that's just me. I reblog everything! Plus since Twitter, it's like, you basically update that anyway so people know what you've been doing or whatever. Am I right?

Anyway, the last blog I truly remember keeping up for quite some time was when I was on Xanga. Man, Xanga was the bomb. All those quotes and icons and stuff? The best. Sometimes I wish I didn't delete my Xanga accounts just so I can laugh so hard at myself for being the 12-13 girl that I dislike on Tumblr.  I just LOL. (that sentence was annoying) I barely remember what I wrote there because I think my posts were basically 3 paragraph tweets. Seriously. I would explain everything I did that day, one by one, which is so annoying because I would blog as if people cared what kind of pizza my friends and I ate on a hot summer day or whatever. Not that people care now or anything, but you know, it was pretty bad.

Speaking of blogging, a friend of mine told me that he probably would think about it before dating a blogger because she might blog about their entire relationship for everyone to see. And I'm like, "Okay, yeah. That makes sense." But I don't know. Is it that any different from those annoying updates couples post/share or whatever on Facebook? Like those, "Dude, we get it. You guys are fighting." or "Y'all should just text or IM or talk on the phone, okay? We don't need to know that cheesy baby talk thing you guys apparently do!" Don't get me wrong, some couples do this dance very well, so it's not annoying. Those types of couples get more if a, "WELP. THAT SHIT WAS CUTE. #foreveralone," reaction which is the good kind of annoying. Maybe. I'll get back to you on that.

There's probably a Date a Girl Who Blogs article out there somewhere, but I'm too tired to Google it. You guys can just update me if one actually exists. I actually don't know why we like to blog about our lives. People with very interesting lives, sure, but not-so-interesting people like me? I don't know. I guess we just have a lot of feelings and having journals aren't enough. Meh. But whatever, I'm still going to write about things that matter to me, or don't. I mean, obviously it matters to me because I wouldn't blog about it if it didn't. Actually, it can go both ways. If something is really, really important to me, I either blog about it 'til the ends of the internet or not blog about it at all because I want to keep it for myself. Which I admit, I'm not very good at. I've always been one of those people who always need to say what they feel because if I don't, I would really lose it. That's done me good and bad. C'est la vie.

Last Week

.... was one of the best I've had in a while.

✓ CSA friends
✓ Beer
✓ Perks of Being a Wallflower
✓ Tea time
✓ More CSA friends
✓ DLM shoot
✓ Basketball
✓ Football
✓ Molave friends

It was a bit crazy and that's why I was really tired, but it was the good kind of tired. The happy kind. It has never happened that I actually spent time with both my CSA friends and Molave friends equally in a span of more or less 7 days. Best way to end September. It's already October and I can feel the time creeping up to Christmas.

Sorry, I'm Not Sorry

Last night I had some of my old friends over, old friends whom I've spent 90% of my time with during my most formative years, and we just talked the night away. Always my kind of night. We haven't been together in a room in a really really long time, and I found myself just letting it sink in because I've really missed the loudness when we're together. Life is so weird. 7 years ago, if you told me that we're going to be where we are now, I wouldn't have believed you. We probably would've laughed. Except maybe for Tim. I always knew that's where he was going to be, so at least there's that. 

Amidst all the talking and catching up, we somehow ended up looking at old photos that I had when were in grade school and high school and it was ridiculous how much pictures I had. Apparently, I have been dubbed "the treasure chest of memories" or something like that. I have pictures on my wall, my boxes, my Multiply account, basically everywhere and I never delete them or throw them out because, I mean, who would do that? Not me, obviously. I am a memory hoarder.

True enough, out of all my friends, I think I was always the one with the camera. I've always had this urge to document everything, big or small, just because I never want to forget. I like looking at photos and remembering that day/night, and more than that, remembering what it felt to be there. Participating. (Sorry, still not over Perks) But I mean, isn't that why we take pictures? I like looking at old photos and being transported back in time. I guess that's my thing. I have lots of "things," but I'm very particular about this one. I guess even back then I've always had the "this won't last forever" mantra or something and I'm glad because there will come a time that we're not going to be able to do this anymore. It'll become less and less over the years, and that's just life. It will eventually catch up. But in these pictures, we're always going to be there. It's always gonna be there to remind us that we did have nights like this and they were some of the best times we had together. It's just really nice to always be able to have that. Aren't you glad that I took/have those pictures? It's always an LOL moment with old photos, okay? ♡ 

"Some say that this is my fatal flaw but it is something I refuse to change. Because how sad is it, to dull that part of your humanness?"

This afternoon I read this article from Thought Catalog. It's about love and stuff, but that quote above just really stood out and hit home. All these years I always get shit about being so emotionally invested, and for the longest time I was lead to believe that it was a bad thing. Only recently did I realize that it's actually not. Sure, I'm just a bit more (okay maybe a lot more) emotional about these things, but whatever, man. I love us. It's what I feel. It's every bit as real as yours, it's just that I'm more vocal with it. But that's fine, you don't have to say anything. I'm okay with being the one who always says it out loud for us.

10 Things I Should've Learned By Now

A few months back I was exposed to the beautiful art of spoken word poetry, and I stumbled upon Sarah Kay. That night, all I did was watch all the spoken word poetry I could until I fell asleep. The next day, I decided to gather up my courage and email this wonderful lady that has truly put a dent in the way I think and see things. Perspective. I sent an email thanking her for that and asking her if she could give me lists to maybe jumpstart on a writing session or something (writing lists is something she does when she makes drafts of a poem). I never thought she would reply because 1. she was on holiday at the time and 2. she probably gets 100+ emails a day. I just had to tell her that she had reached me and I was contented.

After a day or two, I saw that I had gotten an email from her. I couldn't quite believe it. She wrote me a lovely email and gave me book suggestions and lists to do. I've never actually done any of her given lists, so I thought since I'm starting this new blog for writing purposes, I'd go ahead and just start making them. First of five. Just so you know, this is going to be nothing like spoken word poetry. They're just lists. Maybe.

10 Things I Should've Learned By Now

1. Food somehow tastes better when you're at someone else's house.
2. Life doesn't stop for anyone.
3. The things you want to change never do, and the things you don't, always do.
4. It's not as bad as it seems. You can always try again tomorrow.
5. Buying books in bulk will resort to book hoarding.
6. Sincerely asking people, "So, how are you?" after a couple of shots gets you a pretty honest and decent answer.
7. You will always regret that shot of tequila in the morning.
8. There will always be crap days that could be turned into a good writing session.
9. Your head is there to fight with your heart. All the time. Those feelings you're feeling right now? Sleep it off. 2 am onwards is not an advisable time to tweet/blog ridiculous emotional things because it's 2 am and the feelings take over the world for the next 3 hours. You can feel them all around you, hovering like Dementors wanting to take your soul. Ignore them until you get some sleep. It won't matter as much tomorrow.
10. How to bake a cake. (I seriously should've learned this by now.)

Yeah. That's all I can think of right now. How fascinating.